Tag Archive | marriage

Thankfulness Mondays – An Early Search, and Find

Week 49 (of  52) joining with Bernadette of Haddon Musings and other bloggers, posting each week of something in our lives to be thankful for, whether small or large;  hoping while doing so it will offset some negative areas and perhaps encourage some others along the way.

Today I’m thankful for something frivolous. While in a shopping mall this week not really intending to look for it, I decided to go into a couple of stores that were there, because the malls around where we live, don’t have these particular stores.

It’s not that I needed to get it yet, as I don’t until October, but just thought I’d have a little look. So the first store that I went into, that I thought  would have a good selection of gowns, in fact had very little choice. Of course when you’re being very specific I wasn’t sure about finding the ‘one’ I was looking for.

Lo and behold, the second shop I went into, had many to choose from, and there on the rack I found exactly the right one; at least in my mind. It was the exact colour, length and had a little bolero top to cover the shoulders and upper arms. If you know about women over 70, you might understand why I would want a little bolero or little jacket.

The dress is for our first grandson, in fact the first grandchild to be married, in October. Now you know why I really didn’t need to really be looking yet. I so look forward to him and his beautiful fiancée, being married and starting their life as husband and wife. I pray for them, that they will accept the best and the worst… and that they do love and cherish each other as they go through their life together.

Anyway, I am excited that I found my dress, and so look forward to their coming marriage.

The pictures I’m putting up were actually from the store’s online website, ( as I had to put mine in for alterations. I’m only 5 feet tall and clothes I buy are always too long). I have to say the pictures don’t  do the dress justice. It is, in actuality a shimmering grey, with sequins.

 Of course, I don’t have a figure like the model does, but I am so happy and thankful to have found it, and on sale!

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Thankfulness Monday – Almost 53 Years…..

It’s Monday and so in keeping with ‘Thankfulness Mondays’ initiated by Bernadette at Haddon Musings… I submit the following post.

Wednesday will be my husbands’ and my 53rd anniversary. We went out yesterday with his brother and wife to celebrate ours’ and theirs’ as well. They’ve been married 45 years.

We had a wonderful dinner at a wonderful restaurant. Unfortunately it seems something didn’t agree with me as 4 hours after, I became ill and didn’t settle at all until 2:30 am. It’s really worn me out, but it doesn’t take away the time we spent together recalling when we met our respective spouses, and the day we were married.

When we have been together for so many years it brings memories and feelings that have just increased with each year. Fuss is made for 25, 50, and 60 year anniversaries, but in fact each year brings with it added blessings.

Thoughts of July 27th 1963 and of the first time we met. I was 15 and he was an ‘older man’ of 19. He was and still is an extrovert and I was very shy. I’m not quite as shy though now, and he has become a little less of an extrovert. I guess that’s what happens over the years. Relationships meld together and each becomes less demanding on having their own way.

There are so many facets that make a marriage, but when asked why I believe we have stood the test of time, I say that good and honest communication, and forgiveness are two things that stand out to me. Of course love, sensitivity, trust,  commitment, and many more things are extremely important; but if we don’t talk honestly and completely, and when we make wrong decisions or downright ‘mistakes’……. forgive each other, then I don’t think a marriage has a chance and the love can be tarnished forever.

Marriage is full of trials and tribulations, but when we stay the course it is beautiful, and so the vows we said before God 53 years ago are fulfilled in each other!

16 years of age and he 20

16 years of age and he 20

Our Wedding Day

Our Wedding Day

Last Year

Last Year

Reality… That’s Life !

Hi, I haven’t been very active during the past couple of months, as those who follow me likely know. I’m going to try to start posting again at least with some regularity, but probably only a couple of times a week… I’ll just have to see. I have missed the contact and interaction with my blogging friends. Hopefully, I’ll get caught up also with what’s going on with all of you.

Last night I was just thinking about the challenges in life, as we all have them…. but that’s life isn’t it? The reality of living brings with it so many things. The challenges or problems or whatever word you want to use, also brings many blessings too. I don’t like to dwell on the negative aspects, without realizing that all of what happens in our lives brings us to where we are today.

Being retired and getting older gives one a perspective on the earlier years that have passed. Sometimes, I just want to tell those younger, not to spend time on worrying about how much money they think they need, or the size of their house or all the ‘things’ of life. I want to tell them that people, relationships, hope, forgiveness and really communicating with the ones they love; is where they will find their treasures.

Recently, when we were in the emergency department of the hospital, the nurse who was giving my husband an ECG asked how long we had been married, and when my husband said 52 years, she asked what she thought was the main reason was that he thought made it last. My husband said that quite simply was hard work; that the couples of today have difficulties instead of trying and working at it, they simply feel there is someone else maybe who they won’t have any problems with, and they just give up and move on! Of course nine times out of ten, they will still have similar issues. I don’t think there is ever a ‘perfect’ marriage. When I am asked the same question, my answer is usually that there are two main (not only) but main traits that are important; forgiveness and communication. Maybe that sounds too simplistic and of course there are a lot of things that are necessary, but when I recall certain times of friction in our marriage, those two things were lacking somewhere… at least for a time. Being Christian also, does not automatically create the always loving and ideal person…. we’re broken and frail, just like everyone else; the only difference is that while God doesn’t deal with perfect people…. because they’re aren’t any, He loves us anyway!

Well, in order not to make this too long for the first real post in a while, I’ll leave it there. Hoping to get back into the swing of things again, even slowly but surely.

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D.P. Might as Well Jump or ‘Not’

Today’s assignment for Blogging 101 is to select a ‘Daily Post Prompt’ and write about it. I chose this one.

Prompt: What’s the biggest risk you’d like to take — but haven’t been able to? What would have to happen to make you comfortable taking it?

I tried to think about some risk; actually any risk that I’d like to take and really couldn’t.

Throughout my life I suppose I’ve stepped out of my comfort zone on occasion, but I’m not a big ‘risk taker’. I’ve lived my life facing many adversities, with depression, multiple sclerosis and other medical issues, loss of loved ones and in general I guess all of the various trials any person or family faces in life.

Some I would suppose consider that it is rather boring not to take a risk of some kind,  not adventurous at all.  My life has been anything but boring, with lots of drama but also lots of joy. From the moment that we were married and had our three children and then grandchildren and not to be forgotten our one great-granddaughter, life has not been dull. Learning to be parents is full of surprises and pitfalls. We kept very close the handbook of parenting;  Dr. Spock… not the Dr. Spock of Star Wars… but the renown Pediatrician of our generation and his ‘Baby and Childcare’. If the baby’s crying and we can’t figure out why, look it up in his book; if he’s got a suspicious rash look it up to see if we should be taking him to the doctor or emergency. I lost count I think of how many times we thought he had measles or chicken pox…. but alas it was only a heat rash.  I should note that in retrospect Dr. Spock was not always right, but in the moments of  sheer terror that we as new parents sometimes felt, he was the ‘port in the storm’. Ahh yes, I remember it so well!

Although my husband and I have differences in our personalities, the one thing we do have in common is that neither of us are fond of taking risks. We weren’t afraid to step out in faith different times in our marriage; everyone has to make decisions, but if there was any chance that something had an element of not being in the best interest of us as a family, we just didn’t do it.

The security of everyone’s well being and safety was paramount in our lives, and still is. Maybe we missed out on some opportunities, but when I look back on our lives……. it’s okay; we’re content and we’ve been blessed!

 

Trifecta – Lesson Learned

Challenge:

trifecta -logo

trifecta -logo

This weekend we are asking you to play around with the following quote:

Three things in human life are important. The first is to be kind. The second is to be kind. And the third is to be kind.
–Henry James

We want you to follow the same general structure of the above quote.  Feel free to change the subject–tell us what’s important about coffee or houseplants or whatever you’d like.  Or else change up the modifier–instead of telling us what’s important, tell us what’s sexy or overrated or pernicious.  Your last three lines should closely echo James’s, giving us the same answer three times.

For instance, a post might look like this:

Three things about Trifecta Writing Challenge are amazing.  The first is the community.  The second is the community.  And the third is the community.

(But we kind of expect your submissions to be far, far better than that one.)

Your word limit this weekend depends on your word choices, but because we want you to closely follow James’s structure, all posts should be somewhere around the same number of words as the above quote.  For the sake of clarity (and brevity), we’ll impose a thirty-three word upper limit.

My entry is as follows and my response is somewhat ‘tongue in cheek’.

There are three important facts learned after fifty years of marriage and differing opinions. The first is “I am right!” The second is “I am right!” The third is “I am right!” 

Weekly Photo Challenge – Pattern

Prompt: In a new post specifically created for this challenge, share a picture which means PATTERN to you!

SAMSUNG DIGIMAX D530My photo appears to be uninteresting when one looks at it. It is a piece of material with a soft blue-gray color. As you can see it looks like there is a lace background, interspersed with sparkles that are like the stars that appear in the sky on a clear night.

You might think that this is not such an awe-inspiring pattern and wonder why I would choose to display it.

The reason I am doing this is that this small sample of a somewhat simple pattern represents to me anticipation, excitement and of celebration.  This July my husband an I will celebrate our 50th anniversary. While that is half a century and therefore for most, a long period of time, some days it seems like just yesterday that we joined our hearts and lives in marriage. I was only 18 and he was 21. We had no idea really of what lay ahead for us, but we knew that we wanted to share whatever it was.

We had hopes of a family and were blessed with three children, who now have children of their own. The path was not always an easy one but we met each challenge as it  came, and discovered so much about each other, life and our faith. Without our faith and belief that God intended us to be together, it would have been easy to give up but with perseverance, patience, forgiveness and communication we did not and  we will remember that day fifty years ago, this coming July.

So how does that little piece off material have to do with all of this? It is that we are celebrating with a beautiful trip to Aruba and I wanted to have a very special dress for our special day. I wanted to feel like I did that one day when I wore another special dress; one that made me feel like a princess. Call me sentimental and nostalgic.

Well, I don’t suppose at my age I would consider myself to now be a princess, but it will make me feel perhaps a little like a ‘queen’!

Here is a picture of the whole dress to make the small piece above make a little more sense….SAMSUNG DIGIMAX D530

Trifecta – My Advice Is….

trifecta -logo

trifecta -logo

Weekend Challenge:   We want you to give us thirty-three words of advice.  Your advice can be to anyone or about anything.  We only ask that you make it uniquely yours.  Please visit  Trifecta   if you wish to participate.

After being married for fifty years, my advice is to go home and talk.  It does absolutely no good to run away. Communicating and forgiveness are the keys to success in any marriage.