Pondering Life and Death ……………

My brother’s wife passed away last Thursday, but to me she wasn’t an ‘in-law’ but always considered my sister!

Briefly, she had an neurological disorder with a very long name, but basically it was a very rare disorder of an unknown origin. The disease progressed very slowly, to the point where her nerve endings were dead. Even so, for many years she could walk and talk; she just couldn’t feel her arms. legs,  and other areas like her face and her fingertips etc. As the doctor explained; as long as possible if she continued to make sure and exercise on a stationary bike etc; the brain would remember how to walk etc. She did so for years, but this spring my brother became unable to care for her, as her abilities had finally diminished and she had to be placed in a long term home.

She had been able to go home for the day last Monday, to celebrate our Canadian Thanksgiving with her family.

On Wednesday she became very ill with multiple issues, but basically her body was just shutting down. Because of the rarity of her disease, she had decided to donate her body with the hope that something could be learned about her condition, and help someone else in the future.

I mention a little about her because whenever there is death of someone close to us, we do tend to think of the subject. I don’t take credit for this thought that I read at some point or heard, but I like it.

When we are a baby in our mother’s womb, we are nourished with food, warmth, comfort and security. We believe this is what life is; there is no knowledge of what lies ahead. Then we are born into this world, and life changes. Usually we are cared for as infants, and the years following; but it is very different than when we were as yet unborn.

As a Christian therefore, it is not difficult to believe that the world we live in now, with all the challenges and joys of everyday life, is not all there is either. We are promised that when our lives on earth have or will come to an end of life as we know it, there is yet one more to come. That is eternity with God, when we believe. While I have heard much about what Heaven is like, with no sorrow, pain illness………….only joy, I won’t really know until that time comes for me.

My mind has just reverted back unexpectedly to a time over 40 years ago, when I had a very vivid ‘dream’ that felt much more. I had been going through a time of depression, but was starting to feel somewhat better; and I had this wonderful sense of being enveloped in a warmth , with an array of colours that seemed to be such as I’d never seen before. While in this “dream”…. I felt so loved, protected and just full of joy that I didn’t want to wake up, but I also wondered if somehow my husband could feel the same… so I was hoping when I did wake up, this would happen. Of course it didn’t, but I wondered if I could or should try to explain it at all to him and maybe our children.  So when I took our my Bible, I asked God  to let me know. I wasn’t in the habit of opening my Bible at random for some special message, but this time I did. The first words that I read were ‘tell the people’. So I did!

I guess this was to me, a little glimpse into heaven.

The Bible also talks about Hell…. I guess I don’t know what that entails totally. It has been described in many ways. My feeling about it is, that for the most part it means an eternity without the presence of God, or joy, peace, love or security. If there is no God, then there is no heaven or hell. We will not be reunited with other loved ones, and this life we live now is all there is.

But I guess you know that I don’t believe that. I believe that there is that world within the womb, the life here on earth, and an eternity thereafter!

Kind of some deep thoughts in this post, but they evolved this week with the passing of my ‘sister’!  


If you look into a baby’s face

With tiny fingers and all its’ toes

With eyes that sparkle

And a little button nose…..

Their hands that grasp your fingers

A smile that grabs your heart

You simply watch and wonder

With the joy that they impart.

The innocence and purity

No malice within their soul

They emanate pure trust

Such a gift that they extol.

For when we look into the face

Of an infant undefiled

A sense of peace, of wonderment

We truly are beguiled.

There was no evolution,

No origin unknown

This child was a creation,

A gift from God alone

Great-granddaughter born 2008

The Act of Forgiveness

For various reasons I’ve been thinking about the ‘act of forgiveness’.

What does it mean or what should it mean?

As an individual we believe that if a person says they are sorry, we ought to forgive them. As a Christian we believe that it is imperative that we forgive someone, even if they do not say they are sorry. Some would say that even if we aren’t feeling forgiving we ought to do so anyway, to free us … to release the anger and hurt we are feeling, and give it to God.

While I certainly believe that forgiveness ought to be our goal, I think sometimes it’s not as cut and dried for some. Should we ‘mouth’ the words without feeling it in our hearts? If it’s just words does it mean anything? As a comparison, I would say that if anyone were to say the words that they are told to say, in order to become a Christian without really understanding or meaning it, is it meaningful?

Would it perhaps be more apropos to pray for God to help us through our feelings, in order that we can honestly say that we forgive someone?

When we are Christians and parenting our children, how do we teach them about forgiveness? If they do something wrong do we simply force them to say that they are sorry, without helping them understand? Do we then forgive them? Sometimes there are consequences to their misbehaviour. Do we punish them in a manner that is equivalent in degree, that their behaviour was?

If we want to present a loving and forgiving God, do we then ensure that they see that compassion and understanding in us as parents? If we are extreme in the punishment we give, how then will this affect their views?



Just some thoughts !

Moment By Moment – Poem

Just some thoughts that I wrote a couple of nights ago….. (Diane)

Moment By Moment


Moment by moment

One day at a time,

This is how it should be Lord

With love so divine.

Blurred is my vision,

And thoughts that I hold,

Faith I must cherish

More precious than gold.

Sometimes when I falter

In thoughts or in deed,

You are there with your arms out

Because of my need.

Though wearied these days

And my body is weak,

By your love and your mercy

Your face I will seek.

Compassion and patience,

I know in my heart,

Will always be waiting

And never depart.

Anniversary Dinner .. we celebrated 54 years last week… Feeling blessed!

LETTER TO ‘ME’ from ‘ME’

July 14, 2017

Dear “Me”

When are you going to stop worrying? Whatever is going on or is meant to be, just ‘will’!

When you stop dwelling on things, and just trust the God you believe in, all will happen as it should.

Right now all you really ‘have’ to remember, is to take one day at a time and ‘do it’, don’t just say it or think it.

There are those things that are confusing you and you have been feeling overwhelmed.

People who you want to find the answers to some health concerns, prompt feelings that take you back sometimes to years ago, in a similar situation. Try not to go there. Just remind yourself again, ‘one day at a time’, and trust them.

Relax more, worry less, pray,  believe more, and enjoy each day to its’ fullest.

Work on those projects that you want to, and when you can; painting, writing, reading, genealogy of family, and gathering some information you want for another personal project.

Write those letters you’ve been wanting to do.

Visit with family and friends more. Get outside and enjoy the summer and soak in the warmth of the sun, and the beauty of the trees, flowers and all of nature.

Give rest ‘to your soul and spirit’, and give thanks to God who made it all.

Sincerely Yours,


Son took photo in July, at their cottage. One day may try to paint….





Sometimes Moments of the Past… Creep Back

Yesterday, for a short time some moments of the past crept in. It happened in a matter of a few words spoken.

I won’t expand on all the details, but it so quickly took me for a surprise, and evoked feelings that were like those when I was going through a time of depression.

The anxiety that I felt was hard to contain and I didn’t.  The initial aspects only lasted minutes, but the emotions that surfaced are still with me today.

It is strange how a word, can lead to a phrase, that then leads to expressions…. that then lead to emotional reactions.

These past few weeks, I have had some challenges with my health. (It seems to me the word, ‘again’ fits) I guess it goes with age some of it. One of the issues was that I ended up in emergency a couple of weeks ago, because I woke up at 3 am not really speaking or making sense. It is possible that it was a mini stroke (TIA) but equally possible it was something else.  There are some other issues, but won’t go into them.

The only reason I mention that last part, is that I guess, not feeling well, it leaves me vulnerable to over-reaction of words spoken, or perceived criticism, whether there or not.

Anyway, that’s what the left-overs of depression, that sometimes ‘lurk’ in the recesses of your mind, can do to a person years later, if conditions are at all present.

For awhile my strength was very much diminished. I know by the end of today, with God’s help,  I will be okay and my physical and emotional well-being will be as it should.

I write this only as more information, that may help or educate one who suffers/suffered with depression, or one who lives with a person who does………….. I guess I also wrote it to just ‘write’ it! ??

(p.s. I’m somewhat slow in catching up on your blogs; I was also away for 3 days with my sister. I’m hoping to gradually catch up) ………………….. Diane xx

Thankfulness Mondays – An Early Search, and Find

Week 49 (of  52) joining with Bernadette of Haddon Musings and other bloggers, posting each week of something in our lives to be thankful for, whether small or large;  hoping while doing so it will offset some negative areas and perhaps encourage some others along the way.

Today I’m thankful for something frivolous. While in a shopping mall this week not really intending to look for it, I decided to go into a couple of stores that were there, because the malls around where we live, don’t have these particular stores.

It’s not that I needed to get it yet, as I don’t until October, but just thought I’d have a little look. So the first store that I went into, that I thought  would have a good selection of gowns, in fact had very little choice. Of course when you’re being very specific I wasn’t sure about finding the ‘one’ I was looking for.

Lo and behold, the second shop I went into, had many to choose from, and there on the rack I found exactly the right one; at least in my mind. It was the exact colour, length and had a little bolero top to cover the shoulders and upper arms. If you know about women over 70, you might understand why I would want a little bolero or little jacket.

The dress is for our first grandson, in fact the first grandchild to be married, in October. Now you know why I really didn’t need to really be looking yet. I so look forward to him and his beautiful fiancée, being married and starting their life as husband and wife. I pray for them, that they will accept the best and the worst… and that they do love and cherish each other as they go through their life together.

Anyway, I am excited that I found my dress, and so look forward to their coming marriage.

The pictures I’m putting up were actually from the store’s online website, ( as I had to put mine in for alterations. I’m only 5 feet tall and clothes I buy are always too long). I have to say the pictures don’t  do the dress justice. It is, in actuality a shimmering grey, with sequins.

 Of course, I don’t have a figure like the model does, but I am so happy and thankful to have found it, and on sale!