I was speaking with someone today, and she was saying that she realizes she is sometimes very outspoken. She just believes that for the most part, she says what she feels, although she said perhaps too much so.
I lean to the other side, because I guess it depends on your parents and my mother just didn’t like to hurt anyone’s feelings or perhaps offend someone. In fact she likely did so to the extreme.
Sometimes I do get the urge to speak my mind, but for the most part before I do, I try to give myself a little time to decide whether I should say something or not. I gave an example to my friend that recently we were at an occasion where there was a ‘silent auction’. The concept seemed a little unusual, because some items were on the table, and if you wanted to bid on it you wrote the price and your name beside it. One item that I decided to bid on I put $15 below someone who bid $10, and then tried to keep an eye occasionally to see if anyone bid above it. So as long as you were the last person to bid, you would get the item.
When the announcements of the winners of the bids were done, my item went to a someone else, and they said it went for $10. I was a bit befuddled because I had put $15, but didn’t say anything at the time. Then when I was thinking of how this might have happened it occurred to me that the person who had bid the $10 had most assuredly erased my bid so they could get it instead.
The organizers had put pencils to write with and so it was easy to do I guess. My immediate reaction was I have to say ‘anger’ and injustice. I had the feeling I wanted to say something. I paused for awhile; bit my tongue and decided against it because it seemed to be something that in the scheme of life was really not that important, and if the person really wanted it that bad, then so be it.
There are times that I do speak my mind, more so now that I’m older it seems, but if and when I do I try to make sure it is necessary to do so, and does not intentionally embarrass of offend anyone.
So silence is ‘golden’ I think, when if by speaking it ‘tarnishes’ another’s feelings unnecessarily.