When I Can’t Remember Anymore

Yesterday I learned of an elderly friend 92 years of age, who passed away. She had been dealing with Alzheimer’s for the last 11 years of her life.

It was one of her daughters who let me know, and while of course she and her brother and sisters were sad to lose their mother, they knew that it was her time to go.

I don’t know a lot about Alzheimer’s disease but I do know that losing one’s memory is a big part of it. I can appreciate what that likely does to that person, and to their family. In this case her mother only very recently had trouble with recognizing some people. However, she said that she did recognize even as late as the last visit two weeks ago, her children.

I can relate to how it feels to have someone close to you, not recognize or the inability to tell you whether or not they do, as for the last 7 years of her life, my mother could not do this.

To a small degree, I can imagine what it must be like to be that person, who either can’t remember or recognize people, or let those that love them know verbally whether they can or not. While I am not severely debilitated by M.S. my memory is one aspect that troubles me. When it falters a bit or more than a bit, I do have a disconcerting thought that perhaps one day, I will be in my mother’s shoes so to speak, and I thought of what I might think or say beforehand, to those that love me ‘just in case’.

Just in case I can’t speak

Or tell you I love you

Perhaps I’m too weak

And won’t know what to do

I may stare into your eyes

And hope so that you’ll know

That though I’m not wise

I can remember you so

Don’t be upset, and don’t ponder too much

For the way things are

The memory and such

Instead, please reach far

Into your mind

And remember me when

I was loving and kind

Though you can’t know

By seeing my face

Know that I love you

‘Just in case’.

 

 

 

 

 

13 thoughts on “When I Can’t Remember Anymore

  1. It is hard to imagine the pain of seeing a loved one lose her memory. I can only pray that they find consolation in the memories they have with their loved ones. your poem captures that fear and tenderness.

    Like

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