Do You Really Know Me?

How many people really know you?

I was looking at my list of things I might at some point blog about that I write when the thought comes to me and this was one that I had written some months ago.  Along with it I made a notation beside it that said ‘secrets within’.

How many of us can say that we have many, or some, or none that really know about what we love, hate, think about, dream about and just know all the good, bad and (I won’t say ugly) the not so good things about us.

There are of course our families and I would suppose that some know a great deal, but do they only know what we let them know or can they really understand what goes on inside our mind?  They may know a great deal of ‘things’ but do they know the most important? For example, my husband knows a great deal about me as do my children. They know I love them very much; they know that I am a bit on the reserved or they might consider in some cases ‘prudish’ side. They know that I don’t really like off-color jokes if anyone is around who might tend to tell one, and they know that I am somewhat very gullible.  Sometimes they will say something outrageous just so I will react and then they smile and let me know they were putting me on. I fall for it every time too!

They know that I had a really difficult time with depression, and they loved me anyway.  They love me when I ‘worry’ even though they’re adults when they tell me they are going ice fishing and all I can think about is that the ice may not be thick enough, and I tell them to ‘be careful’, as if they wouldn’t if I didn’t say so.  Yes, they know a great deal but not all within me.

And then there are friends/acquaintances that we try to be open and honest with. Yet there are some times we withhold areas of our lives which we think are too tender a subject to disclose, in case they might think less of us.

My mistakes that I make are usually brought out in the open and confessed, but there are some thoughts we have that seem/are wrong and we don’t want to admit it to another and so we keep it inside or in my case talk to God about. No one knows of these things.

At times and I have found it here with some of whom I blog with, that I can be more forthcoming with things that are on my mind and heart and find no judgment but instead support, love and encouragement. There are some issues that if I were to tell to those closest to me, it would make them worry. In one instance I confided something with one person in particular that I blog with but not to those closest to me. There was no intent on deception, only that it happened at a time when I was very emotional. Was I wrong to do so? I have asked myself that and I have determined that God puts certain people in our lives for a reason, and He uses each relationship to accomplish what He wills for us. If it were something that necessitated my family knowing I would of course tell them, but in this case it served no good purpose to do so.

Does anyone else find the same thing? Does anyone else have secrets that they keep within themselves for whatever reason?

Maybe I’m an ‘over-thinker’ and these are issues that only I deal with!

20 thoughts on “Do You Really Know Me?

  1. Diane,
    You are so right about the need to open ourselves more with those who we love and can trust. As I am sure you know …. there is one friend that we can tell EVERYTHING to and that is our wonderful Lord! Those parts of our life that we can tell no one else, we can always tell Him. He understands and will accept us when we come before Him in faith.
    Lord bless you Diane. Thanks for the posting on a very sensitive subject for us all.

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    • You’re right about sharing all with the Lord…(even though I realize He already knows) and those things that I need those close to me to understand about me… I share with them… Thanks for you comment Rob…Diane

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  2. I was always sad that my own family never knew me. They lived with me for 17 years, with very little privacy, knew and controlled everything about my life – and still had no clue who I was when I left. Not a clue. I do keep a lot from people – because I’m scared of judgement. I’ve been hurt a lot and don’t want to give people anything to hurt me with. And then, the flipside of that is I havent’ really got much to hide, I just am who I am and I can’t pretend to be anyone other than that. Don’t want to either. I have come to a place where if people dont’ like what I am or find me a bad person – I can’t change that and I don’t have any energy left to expend on letting it bother me.
    So does this make sense? I share nothing, and I share pretty much everything? Yes I do share more with strangers than I do my own biological family.. I also tend to hold back more with people I’m close to, friends who have become my chosen family – because I become very aware of how much they would worry if they knew I was unwell, or depressed, or whatever.
    Sorry for the ramble. Just wanted to check in and catch up with you. blessings and hugs xxx

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    • It makes perfect sense…To those that know me well and whom I trust, I am an open book. What you see is what your get. To some others I will be what you want me to be and not perhaps confide things that I know you would not want to hear or know. Keep the relationship where they want it to be.

      Sometimes I am misunderstood and that saddens me. I can try and try to help them do so, but in the end it’s up to that person…Diane

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  3. You are right. No one really knows our deepest secret and thoughts. Only God.
    There are things that still I want to be keep hidden or else I am an ooen book for everbody.
    Have a nice day.

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  4. This is great topic, Diane. Thank you for bringing it up. I decided a long time ago to live my life as though everyone in the world would see my every action. I tell those who are closest to me anything that could get back to them so they are never blind-sided by surprise news about me. That’s how I handle my actions. My thoughts are different. I believe that all or nearly all people sometimes have terrible thoughts, and that merely thinking them doesn’t make the people weird, crazy, or bad. It is in the acting out of thoughts that can sometimes get people into trouble. So, I’m careful with my actions, and tell people about them, but my thoughts are personal and private. I sometimes share them with others and sometimes don’t.

    Thank you for your friendship, Diane.

    Russ

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    • Thanks for your comment…I agree about being very forthcoming about my actions or decisions that I make. I usually begin by saying to whomever…”just so you’re aware…..” The very occasional time I have kept something from someone…it is so they would not worry or if it would hurt them…but if I was ever asked about anything related to it I would admit it…as I believe lying then would be wrong…. And as you say some thoughts are shared and some aren’t…. Diane

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  5. I think Hubby knows most things about me, what I keep to myself he will eventually know…There are some things that are too painful for him to know, and those things I don’t share. If he does eventually want to know I think I could tell him. I certainly don’t share everything with everyone.

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  6. I’m an’over-thinker’, so perhaps not the best to answer. Most things I have shared with someone, but no one person hears it all. There a few nuggets that I keep to myself and for the reason you seemed to give. If it will not do me or anyone else any good, then why share. I think a lot of people hold a small piece of themselves to just be their own.

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