Lately I have read a few blogs that talk about the ‘judgement’ of others and how it has affected their well-being in their live. I have given it some thought and I realized how prevalent it is in our society.
Even as children I think they judge each other by what toys or electronic gadgets they possess. If the kids have a lot of them they are judged as being lucky or rich and they look forward to going to those friends who have such things.
As teenagers a girl is judged as being ‘easy’ or loose morals….I won’t use other words that are likely used because I don’t think it’s necessary, but you get the idea. In many cases this is simply untrue, but gossip starts. It sometimes happens because the girl in question does not live up to the standards that the most popular and well to do girls have. The nicest brand name clothes and shoes and money to spend freely. It doesn’t always come down to being of loose character, but just being plain and ‘poor’ in the eyes of others and not fit to belong to the ‘in’ crowd. I was not a teen yet but in grade 6 when I noticed that I fell into the category of ‘not belonging’. I didn’t have nice clothes and didn’t live in a house in the suburbs with a mother and father, but instead lived in an apartment with my Mom and one sister and brother. I found myself wanting so badly for the other ‘popular’ girls to talk to me and accept me for just being me. I was shy and introverted because of how I was made to feel, and most times at recess I was alone in the courtyard trying to get close to someone so I would not look like I was standing alone. The odd time someone would talk to me but it was never in a friendly way, but more trying to get information about me and how I lived. Back then, divorce was not popular at all, and my mother was not divorced but there was no father in the picture. I would never tell them that my father was an alcoholic and that he had been ‘restrained’ from coming ever to our house…. because while he had not previously been ‘physically abusive’ when my other siblings were being raised (9), after I was born he had on a couple of occasions began to do so. No, I would just leave them thinking they were divorced. It was easier.
Some are judged if we have a mental illness, which can range from depression, eating disorder, bi-polar disorder and the list goes on. They’re ‘different’ and it becomes common knowledge by way of gossip and discussion. These individuals are bullied, brow-beaten and made fun of. Why this happens is obvious, in that these individuals have not been taught to accept those who are different from us. One of the earliest lessons we taught our children was that if they saw someone in their class who didn’t seem to have any friends, to try to be one to that child, because how would ‘they’ feel if they were that person? When Valentine’s Day came along we made sure to always include ones for that child. It may seem like a small thing, but I firmly believed that you had to start bringing that kind of thinking into our children at a very young age. To our delight, through the years of schooling, they remembered that lesson.
I think another ‘big’ way we judge others is as Christians. If someone doesn’t fit the mold of what we think that means, in how they think, dress, act or even pray then we think less of them and we question whether or not they are really a Christian at all. I believe we all have gifts given to us as God’s children and we use them the way that we feel we are meant to. The Bible says that some plant the seed (of faith) some water the seed, and some reap the harvest of the grown seed (salvation). So I might only ever be the one that plants the seed, but that is my gift and I am grateful for it and if I am faithful in it then I believe God is well-pleased.
Ultimately, God is the only one who has the right to judge and I am thankful for that. We need to be able to ‘throw off’ any other form of judgement people try to impose on us. May God help us to do that.