DP Challenge – Show and Tell – A Message to Children

Prompt: You’ve been asked to do a five-minute presentation to a group of young schoolchildren on the topic of your choice. Describe your presentation.

If I had a chance to speak to young schoolchildren on a specific topic I would choose ‘kindness’.

I chose this instead of the extension of kindness, ‘compassion’ because I thought that they would understand that word better. This is what I would say.

Photo Credit
www.123rf.com

“Today I would like to speak to you on the topic of being ‘kind’ to others. I’m sure your parents and others that care for you have taught you about being kind but I’d like to give you some examples of when that might be very important to do.

The place to start being kind is of course where you live and to the people who also are in the home. It might be your parents. Sometimes it is easy to think of your parents as pretty well, the ones who look after you and give you a home, food to eat, clothes to wear, who take you where your need to go and the ones who protect you and care for you when you are sick. What you might forget is that they need you to be kind to them and that might be shown in how you cooperate with them when they ask you to do something without giving them trouble or arguing that you don’t really want to do it. An example of this might be cleaning your bedroom, or picking up your toys in the living room, or even to go and wash your hands for dinner. You would make them so happy if you could do these types of things willingly. This is being kind to them.

Another example of who you might be kind to are perhaps older people such as your grandparents or other people that you know, perhaps a neighbor. When a person gets older sometimes they get lonely because they don’t have a lot of visitors or people to make them feel important still. By talking with them and even perhaps taking some flowers from your garden, with permission from your parents of course, or maybe some cookies, would I believe bring some joy and happiness into their lives.

One more example of the importance of being kind, is to your friends but even more importantly maybe someone who is not your friend because they don’t make friends easily. Perhaps they are very shy, or perhaps they are different in some way so that some children don’t make friends with them. It may be that they don’t dress like everyone else, or they don’t speak like you do or maybe they are a different size than most children your age. They most especially need someone like you to be kind to them and to invite them to play with you and to have fun just like everyone else.

Photo credit
http://www.123rf.com/

If we all showed ‘kindness’ to each other then we wouldn’t have a problem with ‘bullying’ and I think most of you know what that is. That’s when some children pick on others because of the reasons I spoke of because they are different maybe in some way.

So today, maybe you could think of this special word ‘kindness’ and look for people and ways that you could show it to.”

A Touching Story

I received this via email from a friend of mine and thought it worth sharing…..Diane

 

This was written for Children/Families of the tragedy last week ,

By Cameo Smith,Mt. Wolf. Pa. 

                           

It was 11 days before Christmas around 9.38am, when 20 beautiful children stormed through Heavens gate.

Their smiles were contagious, their laughter filled the air. They could hardly believe all the beauty that they saw there, They were filled with such joy, they did not know what to say. They did not remember, nothing of what happened earlier that day.

Where are we asked a little girl in a very low voice. This is Heaven declared a small boy. This is Gods house.

When, what to their wondering eyes did appear. But Jesus their savior. The children gathered near. He looked at them and smiled, and they smile just the same. Then He opened his arms and called them by name. And in

that moment was joy, that only Heaven can bring. Those children all flew into the arms of the King. And as they lingered in the warmth of his embrace. One small girl turned and looked at Jesus face. He could read all the questions she had. He gently whispered to her, Ill take care of Mom and Dad.

Then He looked down on earth, the world far below. He saw all of the hurt, the sorrow, and woe.Then He closed his eyes and out stretched his hand. Let my power and presence re-enter this land! May this country be delivered from the hands of fools. I’m taking back my nation. I’m taking back my schools.

Then He and the children stood up without a sound. Come now my children, let me show you around. Excitement filled the space, some skipped, some ran, all displaying enthusiasm that only a small child can, and I heard Him proclaim, as he walked out of sight. In the middle of the darkness. I am the light.

Written by Cameo Smith, Mt. Wolf, PA

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How Hard is it to Love Thy Neighbour?

I was thinking today of all the turmoil in our world and thought that if we all just treated each other as we would want to be, it wouldn’t be so difficult to change how the world is today at least in part!

What if we really were concerned about the people who lived next door or on the street where we lived? What if we didn’t just shake our head and think there was nothing WE can do about the fact that their house is in disrepair or the kids look shabby when they walk to school? What if we did something without damaging their pride like anonymously leaving some groceries at their door, or anonymously sending a little cash in their mailbox, or asking if they would like some help with their gardening or snow shoveling?

We also can’t forget our ‘neighbours’ in far off lands. I know it’s a struggle to sometimes keep up with our own needs and expenses, but what if we somehow could put some money in a jar until there was enough to send to a trusted organization that helps those in those people in countries that do not even have the bare necessities. What if we made this a ‘family’ project so that our children were encouraged to put just a little of their allowances or money they have into that jar as well.

Let’s think now about teaching our children how to befriend those of their class at school that don’t have a friend, maybe because they are not like everyone else….maybe they don’t have designer jeans, maybe they are overweight or shy or don’t have I phones or some other reason. Perhaps their home life is not as it should be…even abuse.  Let’s teach them when they are young about ‘bullying’ and why it is an awful thing to do to someone…and what to do if they are the one being bullied. If we get them early in their lives it is much easier to reach them.

Okay, now we can tackle the workplace. It’s easy to get caught up with the close friends that we have there and not notice how one person seems to sit by themselves when it’s breaktime or lunchtime. We may think they prefer that, so we ignore them. But let’s think differently….let’s think that they just don’t know how to approach those that seem to group together and they feel like they’re intruding, or will be thought of that way if they try to join them. Let’s invite them to join us, and get to know them. And if they’re hesitant to do so, we can try again and not write them off as not wanting to come.

What about those we come in contact with every day or week and who maybe just need a kind word from us such as the busy cashier in a grocery store or mall. Let’s remember they meet so many people every day and some are impatient and don’t treat them very nice.  A smile and a kind word or comment can go a long way in changing their day.

Last but not least let’s think about those in our own family. Let’s not allow incidents that occur in every family, to separate us by distance or by emotions. We need to talk through these disagreements or misunderstandings as families are one of the strongest bond we have in life. I’m not talking of serious issues that sometimes occur within families such as abuse …either physical or mental….I’m talking about general incidents.

There are other places of course to try to make the world a better place for others such as the Church and even the Blogosphere but the point is that we can make a difference.

So, I ask you… “How hard is it to love thy Neighbour? Maybe not all that hard!

DP Challenge http://dailypost.wordpress.com/ Forever Young

Prompt: If there were a real Fountain of Youth, would you drink the water?

The simple and easy answer is ‘no’, I would not drink the water.

Although the question doesn’t specify to what age, drinking the water would take you, I still would not do so. The early years of my life were full of uncertainties and insecurity. My early teen years were stressful and I did not have friends  who made me feel accepted. I empathize with young people today who are in the same situation and even face bullying.

My years as a young wife and mother were mind-boggling. I was very young (19) when I had my first child and the second 16 months later. The third was then about 3 1/2 years after that. Those years when all were very young were difficult years and yet I felt were good also and sometimes though not wanting to re-do those years, I do like to recall them and often look at pictures to bring back the memories.

My middle years raising a family, working full-time outside of the home but having the ever-present darkness of depression pop in and out of my life, was to me the most tumultuous time of my life. So I definitely would not want to return there.

Having said all of that, I learned in each stage of my life, things that would eventually make me who and what I am today. I feel deeply for those suffering from any kind of mental illness. I would like to encourage them in order that they too might find the peace and freedom from oppression.

I’m in a place now in my life where things have settled down…even though there was the recent move we have gone through. I am happy and just want to enjoy life, but also to do what we can, to help others do the same.

I don’t believe it is wise to want to return to the past even though we’d be younger again, we’d still have new (or the same) challenges to face. Let’s live for ‘today’!

DP Challenge http://dailypost.wordpress.com/ Dear Mom

Prompt: Write a letter to your mom. Tell her something you’ve always wanted to say, but haven’t been able to.

Dear Mom,

Mom and I on my Wedding Day

I don’t think I ever told you how much of an influence you were in my life. I was the last of your children and I watched you as you loved and helped so many of us in so many ways.  Even though you were not rich in the material sense, I noticed when you would get a call from one of your children who were in a financial bind, and yet somehow you would get the money…from where I don’t know except that you probably got a loan to do it.

The times that you would look after my children and others as well, and babysit them for a night or week …whatever was needed. The time you took M.’s 3 children for a year and looked after them because she had problems and couldn’t.

Then there was the two jobs that you worked… the daytime clerical work and then you would go to the Royal York hotel downtown at night checking coats….from 6pm until you would arrive home at 1 am in the morning. I remember one time when my, and D. my brothers’ 2 goldfish …the only ‘pets’ that we had….were floating in the water , and you changed the water and then proceeded to keep stirring the water and revived them. You did this because you knew how upset my brother D. and I would be if they had died because we had them for such a long time and you did it when you got home at 1 am in the morning, knowing you had to get up at 6 am the next day for work. Do you realize how much we loved you for this?

I recall that whenever one of us was sick even when we were married and left home, you would come over and do whatever you could, whether it was cleaning the house or looking after the kids. When my sister C. was depressed and the doctors suggested a procedure be done on my sister, you were there speaking for her because her husband was out-of-town, and she needed an advocate.

How you taught our children about nature by taking them for walks when we would visit you at your home where there was trees and flowers and trails to investigate. You took them early in the morning so we could sleep in at bit.

There was that trip that you and I took out to British Columbia when I was 16 and it was so beautiful and we had such a great time.

The most important thing I suppose that I would want to say to you is that I am so sorry that we couldn’t continue to look after you when you had the aneurysm and the operation and your health began to decline.  Some of your other children and I wanted to look after you and did as long as we could. The seizures that you occasionally had and your ability to be left alone and the deterioration of your body and mind left us with the decision that you needed to be placed in a nursing home.

You weren’t aware of how difficult it was for us to leave you that day for the first time and every time I went to see you thereafter. You were such a vital person in our lives and many others’.  We were reminded how special you were in putting other people first even after you were living in the home….because you broke your hip trying to catch someone else that was falling, and they fell on you.

I someday thought I would write a book about you and our family. You wouldn’t have know that. Because it’s what I felt about you,  I was going to call it “The Age of Grace’….because that’s how you lived out the rest of your life….under God’s grace and I am sure that you were ministered to during those years by loving ‘Angels’.

And one last thing in case you don’t know….I miss you very much!

Your loving daughter Diane xoxoxoxo

Tongues are Wagging

It is said that the most harmful organ in the human body is the tongue. I never really thought about the tongue being an organ, but yes that’s what it is. The tongue’s purpose is to to help us eat, to make funny faces but most of all it is used to help us speak.

We can use it for speaking affirming and encouraging words to help those around us feel better about themselves. It is evident when we do this that good things happen. For example, let’s start when a child is very young. Children can be very trying and cause us dismay in a myriad of ways. They quarrel among themselves and need to be corrected. They run out into the street without looking for cars or we find them sneaking cookies before dinner.  There is so many things that cause us to lose our patience and sometimes our temper. When correcting a small child we must remember that their knowledge is not the same as ours is. They don’t realize the repercussions of their bad choices. How we speak to them when disciplining them can make a difference in how they view themselves as ‘bad’ or just ‘naughty’. They are two separate feelings. A child who views himself as ‘bad’ because of a severe tongue lashing perhaps with calling them names such as ‘stupid’ or ‘idiot’ or ‘bad’ or words such as those, will start thinking of themselves in that way and start believing it, especially if this is a frequent occurrence. Whereas if a child is given an explanation of why their action was not a right or good thing to do, they will be able to separate the action from themselves….so what they did was really wrong but their self-esteem is not damaged.

When children reach their teenage years, it is very important to keep validating them and not being critical in a demeaning kind of way.  If we can only realize that the teenager’s brain is not fully developed as far as their reasoning skills. That’s why they often do things that seem so obviously wrong to us as adults, but to them it’s not. Examples, like driving too fast, or text-ting while walking across streets or even driving, or staying out too late. They don’t (can’t) always follow the consequences of doing these things, so calling them dumb, stupid, inconsiderate and on and on does nothing constructive.

Now as adults we perhaps do the most grievous things with our tongues. We gossip, tell lies, talk ‘down’ to those we think don’t live up to our standards and worse. We can cripple another human being with what we negatively say and swearing and cursing is another way we do damage.

Now having said that the tongue is used in many wrong ways, we can use it n good ways.  We can lift people up with our words, we can make people feel better about themselves, we can encourage someone who is feeling downhearted. A person may need just some kind words to brighten their day and by thus doing we perhaps make them in turn do the same for someone else.

So the next time you let your temper flare and maybe explode into a barrage of words that accomplish nothing except to bring another person ‘down’ try and catch yourself, take a deep breath and if you need a few minutes to collect your thoughts, take them and then voice your concern, disappointment or anger in a more constructive way with words that don’t harm the spirit.

 Titus 3:2

To speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people.

Liebster Blog Award Two

Once again I am honored to say I’ve been nominated for the Liebster Blog Award. While it is the second time I have received it, I am still very thrilled about it. I tried to research the meaning of this and while I found out a little, another blogger told me that this means ‘love’, and if it’s one thing that I have come to acknowledge since starting my blog last November, is that I love to do so. To read and to write…. both are very important in my life.

 Bird from Everyone Has a Story http://birdmartin.wordpress.com/about-me/ nominated me. She indeed is a writer of many caring and inspirational stories and is a friend to many. Thank you so much. By the way one of the reasons she cited for nominating me is that I’ve been married for 49 years. Who would have thought I would receive an award for doing so!!! What extra incentive that would have given me years ago.

Well, I know you’re supposed to say something about yourself but I won’t give a list of them, as I have in previous blogs, but I will tell you that my family, next to God has been the driving force and love in my life. I came from a family of ten, but had only 3 children…2 sons and 1 daughter. One of my sons was born on New Years Eve at 10:30 pm. I was looking forward to perhaps being the mother of the first baby of the New Year, but alas my husband’s wish was granted…he wanted our child to be born in the current year so we could claim tax exemption for the whole year…which back in 1965 was the regulation.  They are grown now and all have children of their own.  There are 8 grandchildren and 1 great-granddaughter who will be 4 later this year. When I was young even, my desire was to have children and they have been such a blessing in my life that I wonder what it would have been like to be without them.

Because I have nominated a number of other bloggers recently I am going to do as Bird did and only choose one this time to give this award to. Because Cindy writes and gives so much of her heart and soul to what she writes and is also one who loves God with all of her heart,  I am nominating  http://cindyhfrench.com/about-m/ Please take time to read some of her blogs. She has such a testimonial to God’s grace and healing in her life.

Searching For Self – Poem – Memories

 

My Sister Catherine

This is a poem from my ‘Memories’ series written for me by my sister Catherine  It was written when I was in my early 30′s and my children were small, and I was experiencing a time of stress and depression.  She understood my history, my desires for a family free of want of love or needs. She also understood what the ‘darkness of depression was like, as she had gone through a period of it as well. I cherish the feelings that she put into this poem for me. I will warn you that it is a bit long. She wrote what she believed about me and my challenges of life.

 

In the innocence of childhood,
She tread a weary path,
Deprivation and hunger,
Were constant companions,
Peppered with small joys,
Along the way,
Now and then, happy thoughts
Of love, gentle embraces
And wiping away of tears.
To soon, too knowing,
Then the sweet bloom of youth,
Shone on the horizon, bringing
A new kind of love,
First love, then true love…
And marriage.
Distant memories began to fade.
With contentment, magnificent
New Worlds opened now…
Then..marriage fulfilling,
And Sealing off all doubts,
And the fears of years gone by…
For a time,
The crowning glory of her life
Was born with motherhood,
Now she, the fears dispels in
Her Infants.
Her children do not want for food,
Love, necessities and much more
Belong to them.
The only fears they know are the
Natural fanciful imaginings
Of any child.
Quickly though are their doubts
Banished from their thoughts.
Each question answered, one by one,
By a loving mother,
Making sure they never feel alone,
For long,
Trying to ensure that insecurity,
Is an alien stranger
In their lives.
Her teenage years have
Long since passed,
As she enters a new threshold
Of her being.
Her children do not yet know
Or sense the awful turmoil,
Once again within her mind.
She questions her existence,
Her purpose and her destination.
She has seldom known,
The carefree feeling of a child,
Protected, nor a youthful time,
For discovery of herself,
Nor carefree roaming and yet,
Dreaming now and then,
There was no time along the way,
For frivolous indulgence,
Or in just anticipating.
She had to make her way and
Only rarely cast an envious
Glance at those around,
With secret longing to share
In their pursuits.
Wistful thoughts of college campuses,
The splendid proms and party dress.
They had the money and the time,
She knew, to charter their life’s course
In leisure, without care.
Barely thirty now,
She wearies,
As each day is faced
With longings yet unsatisfied.
Her thoughts run deep,
Questions race within her being,
As yet, no answer shows.
Despair grows great…
Although,
Even this she can’t indulge,

There is no time!

Where Did They Go??

I was just noticing something the other day and that was the fact that children today have different ways of entertaining themselves. So different from when I was a child (okay that WAS a long time ago)….but even since my own children used to play.

So I was wondering……

where have all the children on tricycles gone?….

and what about little girls walking down the street with a doll carriage and their precious baby inside?

and where are the children playing ‘hide and seek?…..

and what about the little girls with a skipping rope? ..remember ‘double dutch’?

and the sand boxes with children building castles and playing with their little toy trucks in the sand?

and playing in the school yard with their friends ?(we used to play with a ball or two against the bricks)

and what about building forts mainly out of blankets hung over chairs?

Maybe there are still some children that do these things, but I haven’t been able to see any.  This is where I guess I mention that the electronic toys have taken over. Not just computer games, but the I phones, the Tablets that have games on them also but of course the television itself. Even some of the younger children want to use these things instead of their imagination.  I realize there are some parents that try to insure their child goes outside for a while, but I’m not sure what they do, because I don’t see them doing any of the fun things that we used to do.

In the summer, there are many summer camps that offer more creativity, but not all families can afford this. Granted in the winter there is hockey, but it’s all organized now…not played on rinks flooded on the school grounds. In the summer there is baseball and soccer, but again they are all organized it seems and not too much just played for fun.

Isn’t there some way we can get imagination and plain old fun back into our children’s lives?

Wandering Thoughts….Memories

This is another blog of something I wrote 12 years ago, (memories)  when I was still searching myself to see what I could learn, if anything.  I was still (or again) in a depressed state of mind. I look back and realize how far I have come. I believe for the first time in my life, I can say that I have climbed slowly with God’s help and that of family, friends and an array of doctors but the doctor that I have seen for the past 11 years of my life having helped me the most.

It is in effect a glimpse into somewhat of a journal…though it was only written on a pad of paper.

My hope also in writing some of these thoughts is that there may be someone who may identify with them, and realize that many others have questions and doubts during difficult days.

“I am a person, female, child of God. I am a wife of many years. I am a mother of 3 children, J; J; and K. I am a grandmother, sister, sister-in-law, aunt, cousin, and friend. I am a different person to different people.

I have had a difficult time since as far back as my teen years…with reactive/clinical depression. I have few memories from my childhood but mostly the insecure moments and times. I was the last child born in a family of 10. I wanted the love of a father which only happened when I met…my  Husband-to- Be’s Dad. He was so sweet to me. My own father I only met when I was about 11 or 12.  He was an alcoholic and had other vices as well. My mother was the person I most loved and admired. She was I believe 42 when she had me. She had a most difficult time trying to have a home and raise all ten of the children to grow up to be good people and citizens. She was my role model as to what a woman should be…intelligent, loving, diligent, hard-working, honest and forgiving.

I got married when I was 18 to ‘W’ after going with him 3 years. He had the same ideals about raising a family and felt we were compatible. I guess since he was so outgoing, it attracted me to him, because I was so quiet and introverted. He made me feel wonderful and I grew to love him. I always felt …he didn’t love me to the degree that I loved him.  Maybe it was that I thought he didn’t ‘need’ me like I needed him…but he said that he loved me. I would say that I was insecure though for many or even most of the time I have been with him.

In some of the days of our marriage we did have some problems but at the end of the worst of those times I truly believed since we made it through, there would be nothing in the future to hinder our relationship again.

During the years, I really worked hard to be a good mother and wife. We didn’t want our children to be undisciplined and callous human being. We tried to make sure this wouldn’t happen as we disciplined when necessary and had many, many long talks.

Also, it meant spiritual teaching…sometimes at church, sometimes by us at home.  I worked outside the home, sometimes part-time and other times we would work opposite hours so that as much time as possible was spent with one of us looking after the children. When my mother was healthy she lived with us some of the time and helped to look after the kids. But after she got sick, it was a very, very stressful time. Not that I blamed my Mom at all, but it was just difficult to keep everyone happy.

Over many years, my emotional and then physical health was up and down. I recognize now, I was trying to be all things to all people and I just couldn’t do it with breaking down every once in a while.

‘Perfection in all people and things was my goal…or perception. That of course was incorrect thinking. There was only one ‘perfect’ person who walked the earth, and that was Jesus.

My striving for perfection, was and is still a weak point in my personality. I try not to be disappointed when it doesn’t happen, and try to remember what I am learning in ‘cognitive therapy’.”

……end of ‘journal entry’ that was done in 1999 of previous times….I am of course now in the present 2012 in a much better place, free from the negative thinking and depression…back when this was done.  Thanks be to God.